i am NOT doing that with my feet, or any part of my body
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
Hey cutie is the game almost over? I'm making dinner for us it'll be ready soon. Xox
You would rather make fucking dinner than watch a hockey game that rivals the epic-ness of miracle, the one of the biggest upsets in sport history? Babe I don't know if I can date a girl with such terrible priorities.
He felt like a one man threesome
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
Randomize
