she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
Thanks for taking care of me. I hope I didn't pee in your car.
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Update: his apartment is apparently in the campus Christian community center. The fact that I fucked him on the couch in the lobby is officially my crowning life achievement.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
My boss walked into my office and gave me a toothbrush and tips for dealing with sex hair. She knows what’s up
I went next door to get a can opener from them. They opened the door shirtless, asked me if I wanted to a smoke a joint with them. Then decided to make blueberry smoothies. But the yogurt in the blender & the berries, got confused when the berries blended into the yogurt and just kept adding more. Only stopped when we ran out of berries.
Randomize
