It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
I wonder if he has realized that I have poured all if those shots he bought into the tip jar
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
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