call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
He came up and told us to watch as he chugged his beer with no hands. Then asked if he could come drunk swimming with us.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Randomize
