Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
slow down on the beer.. we don't need another pentabong projectile hot dog incident
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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