"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
Even My mom was ashamed of me bringing her home, she pulled me aside, and told me i can do better than, "butter faces"
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
