he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize