Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Sit down my child. It's time you were told of my famous loss-of-virginity story entitled, "The Penis that Never Could."
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I have a black eye again and dont know why again
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Randomize
