you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
He passed out mid-signature
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
How do guys with small dicks who cheat on their girlfriends get girlfriends!?!
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
if drunk means calling me and asking to borrow the game of life at 2am then I think you were drunk
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
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