Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(402): View more from Nebraska

Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.

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(630): View more from Illinois

week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.

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(617): View more from Massachusetts

creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.

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(613): View more from Ontario

Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.

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(330): View more from Ohio

i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision

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(860): View more from Connecticut

omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.

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(843): View more from South Carolina

i had choclate birthday cake for breakfast and am currently flossing my teeth w a condom wrapper. at work. hot mess for 200 alex

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(605): View more from South Dakota

Make me food? I don't want to be a science experiment. I'm dunk. Holy shit. Drunk*. Let's do science.

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(512): View more from Texas

All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"

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