halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He had me believing he was actually British until he came and used his real voice.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
He was out clubbing with his SON. WHY did you let me KISS HIM? Also WHERE WAS HIS SON?!
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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