I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
So I made him an imaginary sandwich and told him that the day I didn't have to fake it, neither would he.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
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