We named our party play list daddy issues
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
Apparantly 7 1/2 Vicodin is a 1/2 too many.
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
Haha no we did it on his bed. Then rolled off into the bean bag. It was a strangely athletic performance on my behalf.
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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