I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
something came early last nite... and lemme tell u it wasn't christmas...
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
Tonights theme there is the 7 deadly sins. Greed, envy, sloth, gluttony, sluttiness, fellatio and vodka.
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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