Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
So after tonight I now have 6 Harry Potter movies left to get laid to. Before tonight it was 8. Fucking right
You kept saying we got to find the end of the rainbow, which turned out to be a box of lucky charms and Guinness in the bag of cereal
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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