Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
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