oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
I didn't want to but I was drunk in a Disney bathroom with her and had a weak moment.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
He licked me while I ate pretzels and chips. I was really living my best life.
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