I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
the girls on my floor started fighting over who got to keep the random hoodies that boys forgot in my room after sex
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
He returned my car yesterday. Found a duffel bag with beef jerky, condoms, and a handgun this morning. Slightly concerned
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
We're too hungover to prance.
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