Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
"What's your dick like homie" is not really an acceptable thing to say out loud
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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