sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I just left during the middle of Chemistry to go throw up in the bathroom....and you laughed at my travel toothbrush.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
I couldn't find my shirt this morning so I stole one from his eight year old sister. Slutted up my outfit quite a bit.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
