We're like a lot better than the average bears
Tell your broad to take a big shot of 'chill the fuck out' and put it on my tab.
Me too!
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
