No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
who were those guys at the table sniffing dryer sheets?
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
