my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize