hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I love him. He's like the father I never had that I kind of want to fuck.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Can you please explain to me why there are 7 bags of tacos in my bed?
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
