i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
oh I'm washing fake blood out of my bra.
I NEED to hang out with you more
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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