We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I woke up in the ER. This living like theres no tomorrow really could mean theres no tomorrow.
Lol okay. He's gonna show up with like a trunk of sex toys. He's like the mary poppins of hotel fucking.
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I need something for rope burns and an inner ear infection. Separate incidents, FYI..
I was drunk, he was taking a bodyshot while avoiding my piercing. I told him I loved him. He waited until I woke up with my hangover to say he loved me too. It was hangover magic.
Give me a minute. I'm trying to buy moonshine from a railroad worker named "Cowboy."
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
Randomize