google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
There's no button for "gave my boyfriend's cock to a friend" on my intimacy calendar.
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
He showed up to my apt at 6am wearing a suit and holding a bag of coke....how could I not let him in?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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