We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
so according the 72 facebook statuses i put up last night that i don't recall, i would say it was a success. how about you?
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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