Me hooking up with her is like rush being president. Bad news.
I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
Randomize
