This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
The only way I made it through work was reminding myself how many margaritas per hour I was making
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
I was stalking his twitter and saw that he used punctuation in a hashtag. Thank god we didn't work out because I can't be with someone that incompetent
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
So.. I was kinda upset i got the bad fuck out of the situation
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
