I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
