Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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