How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
just woke up and my boobs have "fun police" written on them
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
Some guy thought i was the waitress and handed me his credit card. drinks on me.
Both the cop and the paramedic were hitting on me while I was on the ambulance. My boob fell out and they just about had full on erections right there. They Came back two hours later to sign my cast with their phone numbers. #stillhotwhilebleeding
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
Randomize
