So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Do you reaalllllly want to put "porn editor" on your resume?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Hes warming up week old McDonalds french fries, putting hot sauce on them, and counting them with his shirt off.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
I wanna be like, dude, I peed your bed. Like you laid in my pee. And we're not dating. You can find another fuck buddy who I'm sure won't piss on you.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Text me some of your sweat
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize