Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
All my credit cards need to be pressure washed
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Randomize
