haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I can't wait for round whatever # we're on tonight.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
the night probably should have been over when the guy let her fill out my mechanical bull waver for me because i couldn't read
My drug dealer just made me weigh out my own weed because he was in the middle of taking his law enforcement final
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Listen, all I’m saying is, if you’re lying naked next to a hot chick, you don’t start discussing dental hygiene.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
