While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
So my birthday was awesome. Only remember 45 min of it but I woke up with a girl on the couch and a half bowl of ground beef
I was hooking up with this girl last night and she's on top of me with "Flux Pavilion - I can't stop" grinding in the background and I thought "Holy shit I'm going to do a lot of Molly this semester."
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
Please let me buy the coffee, all my assets are in starbucks gift cards
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
Turns out he's not a Doctor Who fan, I mumbled Alons-y as I went down on him. He asked who Alan was. No more drunk sex for me!
Also at one point I told him to say my name and it took him like 5 seconds to remember.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
Randomize
