last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
Dude she's from Moscow. I feel like I'm cheating on America.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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