check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
He ended up walking out of his bedroom and told me to look at the nonexistent fire he was holding in his hand. Im upset I didn't take those shrooms.
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
Is it too early to start a donation jar for my 4th of july hospital bills?
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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