whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize