But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
her vagine was all disorganized.
dude you just took shreks wife home. what the fuck is wrong with you
when a bears hungry he eats besides shes got her nipples pierced
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
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