She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
I will pee on everything he values.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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