he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
Best surprise in my car. A cookie, sliced kiwi and the rest of my margarita. Work is going to be awesome.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Not this time. I'm drinking in my sweatpants which means I've given up for the day and shouldn't be in public.
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
