oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
I'm legit concerned I might pass out this weekend from having too much sex.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
