Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
I'm going to sing sad and lonely Barbra Streisand songs at the top of my lungs if you don't get here soon
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
