no weekend plans? you're practically married
just without the last name or joint bank account
i'd advise against both
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
I based a lot of our friendship on the fact that I thought you were crying from feeling so sad for me when I got crabs. I'm not sure if we can ever be as close now.
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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