is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
Bruh, I wanna absorb into the deck.
I wanna become a plank.
God I love xanex.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
How was the tequila? Are you making bad decisions yet?
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
