I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I wonder sometimes what your vagina thinks about you.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
I'm skipping the 'hey, how are you, I have to pick up something pointless at your apartment' excuse and just telling you I'm coming over to fuck.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
Terrible idea I love it
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Randomize
