i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
The prostitute across the street from us is having a seizure on her front lawn again.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
People were running around punching out the ceiling tiles Super Mario style.
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I'm so high that hamburger just went up my nose. Mustard BURNS
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
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