His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
he said he would handcuff me to his penis. thats not even possible. i want to go home.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
Got an egg Mcmuffin combo, and put the hash brown in the sandwich. That level of hungover
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
Randomize
